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The end my only friend~
 posted by Flippety on Sun Jan 17, 2010 8:34 pm





/touch Euribaby

This is the end
Beautiful friend
This is the end
My only friend, the end
Of our elaborate plans, the end
Of everything that stands, the end
No safety or surprise, the end
I'll never look into your eyes...again
Can you picture what will be
So limitless and free
Desperately in need...of some...stranger's hand
In a...desperate land
Lost in a Roman...wilderness of pain
And all the children are insane




This is indeed the end my friends... an end of sorts and a beginning also. This is my last news post for Club Fu. And along with it comes the end of a journey... and an incredible journey it has been. I managed to make many friends along the way and a few enemies I'm sure: Happy Jadenpain, Raskas, Redrum, Xanathol, Trevan and Darktide just to name a few... SKs suck.



CLICK THE PIC TO START MOVIE


Over the years I have also had the honor of meeting a good number of you all. All totaled, over 30 people. And that's not counting Fan Faire. Currently I am even roommates with Triangles and Etuinka from old school EQ. =)

Also had the pleasure of meeting this woman... twice.



CLICK THE PIC AND SCROLL DOWN TO READ THE POST INVOLVING HER


To list the people I have befriended along the way would take a lot of effort and there is no way I could remember them all. So instead of trying to list them all and insulting the few I manage to forget, let me instead name only one and insult you all... Sweetevill, you have always been there for me from the beginning in WTF!/Hugs all the way through to Club Fu, through the good, the bad, and the ugly. (See entry: Corboy) And I love you dearly sweet Sheriff.

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As some of you I am sure know, Pouty, the long time and original leader of Club Fu, has decided to retire from Everquest and step away from gaming. With his leaving, the name Club Fu will retire and in time the new management will reform under a the new banner. It (Fu) is still comprised of the same good people and will continue to be mighty, it will just do it without Pouty. A new name has not yet been 100% decided upon. For now it remains Club Fu.

To start off this new generation of mightiness, the reconfigured Club Fu went forth a few days ago and wrecked the new Fippy event. Seeing as how I don't play anymore and I've not seen the event I can't tell you much about it other than I know it was hard and of course a server first.



In all the news posts I have done for news for Club Fu I've never once used a posted screenshot. (Always tried to be different from other guild website news.) But there always has to be a first time. I suppose in the end this is a fitting choice for a final Club Fu post.



One of the greatest joys I got from being in Club Fu was the non-stop server firsts. Every single raid first on Bristlebane has belonged to Fu since shortly after the PoP era. That is an incredibly impressive track record that I am sure will continue.



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Let me reminisce now.



Ah Pouty, the go afk for 6 hours in dangerous places Pouty, the beneficent dictator Pouty, the enigma Pouty, the Fidel Castro of Bristlebane Pouty. So interesting.... so frustrating... so... Pouty. The first, last and only guild leader for the number one guild on the server, leading us to every single server first kill for years and years.



Let me tell you how I came to be in Club Fu. Once upon a time, about 15 years ago, I used to frequent a little storefront called "A Place to Play". This was a nice game store where you could go to and play card games and tabletop games, e.g. Magic, 40k, Warhammer, D&D, etc. Here I met many people and made a few friends I still have to this day. Lexcanium (Cookie) Being one of them. Of course this was long before EQ even existed.

Five years pass and Cookie says, "OMG we need to play this new game called Everquest." We pick a server and play and enjoy it, but then the server becomes crowded and we decide to move to Bristlebane. (This of course ended up being one of the most unstable servers of them all, but such is life.)

Years pass and I join WTF!/Hugs and Cookie in time goes on to join Club Fu but I don't. At the time I was comfortable where I was and doing news posts for them.

More time passes, not sure how much. Cookie says to me, "Hey Boo, you remember A Place to Play? Well guess what! The leader of Club Fu is someone we know from there." WTF... So it turns out that Pouty and I knew each other from this random world location we both used to frequent weekly. How freaking weird is that, to be on the server from the start to Planes of Power and know of this mysterious guild leader named Pouty and yet not realizing I knew the guy. More time passes, I join Fu and begin to do the news for them and haven't stopped since.

Over Christmas Pouty and I rekindled our love affair by meeting at my sister's house for a nice long visit. My daughter Momo got to meet her favorite hippy n00b, that was quite funny. This really is a photo of Pouty and Momo but Pouty will have to remain the mystery he always has. Who doesn't remember the voice of my daughter yelling into Team Speak, "POUTY, YOU ARE A HIPPY N00B!!!"

Good times... good times.



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No post is complete without one of these. CLUM FU!



I'm sure some of you don't know the origin of this so let me explain it quickly. Pouty.... cannot... type... or spell... or both. In a fit of panic as a mob goes shooting up a "column" Pouty yells GET TI OFF TEH CLUM!

This is all documented in one of my favorite things that ever came out of Club Fu... and that would be the PoutyValctionary. Which if you have never seen you should definitely go waste half an hour reading. You can find it here at http://www.clubfu.net/dict/

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It's hard to believe I've made 46 movies and 300+ cartoons and 51 news posts during the time I spent in Club Fu. I learned a lot doing it, too. Taught myself how to use Flash for one and honed my Photoshop skills. All of this was a labor of love and I don't regret any of it, and I will miss it.



CLICK THE PIC FOR OLD SCHOOL MOVIE OF LEXCANIUM KILLING ME IN EVERY SINGLE NON INSTANCED ZONE OF EQ AT THE TIME


The above movie got 30,000 views in the first few days and started me down my Flash Path. It also made me have to get the bandwidth raised considerably to support the traffic on my website http://www.houseofboo.com

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This may be the last Club Fu news post, but perhaps not the last post altogether. Who knows what the future may hold.

Soul Train of Apps!!!

Ahhh the memories. Ahhh the hate tells after I posted one of these. But god they are fun. Even with the few hate tells I might get, these ended up being some of the most popular and most viewed of the news posts. Also the most requested.



The above cartoon is pretty much verbatim for an application Fu received some years ago. Frightening, isn't it.

With the huge influx of applicants Fu has received in the last month there will be plenty of fodder for a new Soul Train of Apps very soon if the new management will allow me the pleasure =)

How about right now?

Applicants in yellow, responses in red, and my two cents remain default white.

As always, it's 75% taken out of context. Player names and guild names have have been removed and certain "give it away" details have been changed to protect anonymity. i.e. Don't complain about it and nobody will know it was you that said it.

Let us begin... deep breath... prepare to get over it... and here we go.

3 years. Left due to declinging numbers of raiders
I bet it gets tiring scraping off all the raiders like so many barnacles off a boat.

See... I'm laughing already.

left due to a misunderstanding with the guild leadership
This usually but not always means, "I was kicked out of the guild for being a douche but I don't want to tell you that because you won't accept me if I did." Think of something a little more creative. Or just tell the truth. We have all been douches at some point.

And someone agrees with me. I don't know this dude from Adam, so I have zero knowledge of his particular situation, but more often than not, statements like these translate to: I acted an ass and pissed off the people in charge.

stopped raiding,i was in

A word on punctuation. The order is word then punctuation followed by a space. Is there some new trend where example . example, or example,example or example ,example is now ok? Or do high school teachers just suck that badly now?

in that long ass fight he only casted 2 times

"Casted" is not a word no matter how many times you use it. -- [kast, kahst] verb, cast, cast?ing, noun, adjective.

Seeds of Destruction Progression:
im void g
Please to meet you. I'm Boo.

Play Schedule:
i can raid all and also ill be on some of the day
Wtf does this even mean.

I feel there are inconguencies in this picture.
I think perhaps the word you were looking for is "incongruities".
Example: I find an incongruity in this reply to an app. /chuckle

And if u not guest it
There is so many things wrong with these few words.
guest �verb (used with object) to entertain as a guest.
So... You didn't not have a person to be not a being you didn't not invite to your home to not entertain as a guest... not?
Ah, I see where you were going with this.... not.

I think this may be the first application I have seen that is a rant from start to finish. I scanned through his app a second time and counted no less than 22 complaints
Note to self: Next time you app to a guild rant non stop through the whole thing and you will get in for sure.

My RA attn. is anywhere from 80 to 89 percent
RA = raid attendance and attn is an abbreviation for attendance. So this sentence should read. My raid attendance attention is 80-89 percent. Therefore 11-20% of the time I will ignore you. HAHA I make myself laugh.

What I can offer Club Fu:
not realy sure what i can do for ya'll
TAG NOW, QUICKLY BEFORE HE HAS SOMETHING TO OFFER!

Previous Guilds:
(Guild name deleted) and haven't left yet and only plan on leaving if i can move on to bigger and better
That's just bad form.

Some applications are very well written but a single typo makes it worth mentioning. A guildy replies to the application with the following.
He can form a coherent statement, so he's certainly worth a look.
*and he used the term asshat; he'll fit right in.

To which I then replied.
He can also form an incoherent statement.
I started played EQ a few years back on Bristlebane.

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You must love them... I command it.



That and I have the greatest title ever bestowed on anyone... ever...
Thanks to the vice-president of marketing at Sony. I met him at fan faire and he was a Houseofboo.com movie fan. So he kindly got a GM to give this to me.



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Ok ladies, it's time for me to pack up my keyboard and head off into the sunset. Let me leave you with a few words I know that have touched the hearts of many people in Club Fu...

As I walked along the worn path, a path so familiar yet so foreign, the trees in autumn splendor, a slight crispness in the air, I thought of how many others must have walked this path before... my staff seemed so heavy lately....my pace no longer light and free, but tired and troublesome.... it will feel good to be home....

*cough* god I still laugh when I read that. Only you old timers will get the reference though. But such is the fate for many of the best jokes.

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We have reached the end my friends. I must now bid you all adieu.
Thank you for the privilege of being able to do these posts. And thank you for allowing me to do them without editing (Except Merci editing my typos) or censuring me. It has been wonderful!

As always... Love Boo ~

Flippety ~ Beating 92% of you 75% of the time with love and affection... so you don't have to.

These are approximately the 3999th and 4000th items I have used to beat people with over the year. And all different!

Follow this link to get a graphic example of the enormity. (Just a small sampling of them.)
http://www.clubfu.net/forum/viewtopic.php?p=31555#31555

Also, take some time and go to hxxp://www.houseofboo.com and watch some of the movies you liked or some that you missed. They may all be gone in the near future.

P.S. I hate you Voodo for leaving Fu after I came back then coming back again after I left. What a dick.
Soul Train of Apps #5
 posted by Flippety on Thu Oct 01, 2009 3:34 pm





This post is dedicated to Dallas. May he forever spell poorly and only use punctuation as an afterthought and incorrectly at that.

Hi Merci! Enjoy the Britney~
Any mistakes made by me in this post are the responsibility of Merci as she is my editor!

Love always, Boo ~

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Every 6 months or so I take some time and go through all the old apps to Club Fu and take out what I consider the fun stuff. The... what the fuck were you thinking?... bits and post them here for everyone.

All names have been removed as have all guild affiliations save those of Club Fu itself.

It never ceases to amaze me how little effort most people put into their applications. The difference between getting praised and getting verbally raped often boils down to the ability or inability of a given applicant's use of capitalization. First impressions mean a lot, even if they don't actually speak for your skill in the game. And even a non-native speaker knows that it's "I" not "i"... so come on, at least try.

I apologize in advance if you got plucked out of the mix and you are a non-native English speaker. I'm usually pretty good at picking those people out and not using them in these posts. Writing in your own language can be difficult enough and in another language... forget about it.

You will find all applicant text in yellow, all Club Fu guild members text in light blue and my two cents will be in white. Everything found here other than my own comments of course are copy pasted out of the App Forum for Club Fu.
So keeping that in mind here we go!

Enjoy the ride and hold on. It's going to be a bumpy one.

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Distant Thunder I left the first time because I was looking to progress through SoF expansion.

The first time? Did you leave, get your progression from some other guild then go back? Will you now progress with Fu and then go back again?
Seems like a Freudian Slip to me.
Did you know, Freud loved his mother.

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In response to an app parsing a mind-staggering 85 dps...

--- DMG: 10085 (0.25%) @ 85 dps (45 sdps)

i literally think i can do this with kicks..........


I could probably lick the monitor and do more than 85 dps.

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(will have soon switch char. from a ranger to rogue working to finish all flags and augs soon as possible)

This isn't even out of context. It's pure confusion from start to finish. I'm sitting here reading it over and over trying to figure out what this person was trying to say and, well... I don't know.

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Computer Specs:
Inte Duo CPU 3.00 GHZ


True, this is only a single letter off and clearly a simple typo, but I decided to google "Inte" and this is what I came up with. I like the beat but the lyrics are really... really bizarre.



This translates to, "Everyone who doesn't dance is a rapist." Or thereabouts.

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Play Schedule:
I normal play from 7 PM EST to 12 PM EST
Sunday to Thrus


So what you are saying is, you play Everquest 17 hours a day, Sunday through "Thrusday" which as you all know is the day after Fringday and the day just before Staturday.

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What I can offer Club Fu:
I have a lots of skill in my class and have been raiding for the past 7 years. I always trying to inmpove my play to maximum my dps to be top dps in the guild.


I always wondered where skill was stored. I should "inmpove my play" so that one day I too can be top dps in the guild.

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After a modicum of drama in this app thread, and by modicum I mean a veritable cornucopia of drama over their dps and weapons, someone comes and saves the day by defending the app.

(App name deleted) is a good player, and a very smart one. I have 100% confidence once he's geared up he will be top 5 dps in the guild. Feel free to quote this thread down the road Smile .

Followed by a naysayer!

He'll never be top 5. Mark it.

Consider it quoted and marked.
I'm sure you are all wondering the outcome of this... No, they never did make top 5.
Careful asking for something to be quoted down the road... I'm quite good at it.

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This particular app gets the Soul Train of Apps Season 5 Award of Unexcellenceness in Appitudinal Failocity.

What I can offer Club Fu:
well-honestly-im not that good. Im just a group geared bard with not that many clickies or rk3. I just get by really. But i do I always try my best. i cant offer much really except offer the best bard i can be the way i am.


You are apping to the #1 guild on the server for 6 years running and the first words that roll off your fingertips are "well-honestly-im not that good". Unless the next words you type are, "Nevermind, I just realized I suck. I will leave now.", you are are wasting your time and ours.

From the same applicant...

Actual playtime 8-18 hours avg a day

"Actual" playtime. 8-18 hours "avg" a day... Isn't language fun? actual: adjective ~ existing in act or fact; so basically it's saying you are are logged on more than 8-18 hours per day, while some of that time is spent online not "actually" playing per se. Now we toss into the ring the word, average: noun ~ a quantity, rating, or the like that represents or approximates an arithmetic mean; in order to have an average of 8-18 hours you would have to have an "actual" playtime of minimum 8-18 hours per day 7 days a week 365 days a year and 366 on a leap year... dude get a life.

I over-analyzed that one a smidgen maybe. I love English.

Still from the same applicant...

Final Comments:
If you made it this far i just wanted to say thank you for your time


You sir, are not welcome.

Then in response... these posts just ice this beauty of an application.

Ran an open Vox raid and locked the loot at the end, ninjaing it all for himself. Def winner.

I agree, definitely a winner. But wait, there is more.

I was in a group today and people were warning me to stay away from (app name deleted), casue he would sit on the chest at the end of a Classic MM , boot everyone from task, the take the loot for himself.

Seriously... winner. Where do they pick up their trophy?

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Award for the most lackluster lazy application of this season goes to this guy.

where is Flippety for the all-time shittiest app add to his list ....

I'm right here, babe.

Seeds of Destruction Progression:
void e

Secrets of Faydwer Progression:
mmm , cry


I'm going to assume that MMM followed by the word "cry" is your way of saying you don't have that key.

Guilds:
(guild deleted)

Computer Specs:
core 2 duo

Play Schedule:
4-10

What I can offer Club Fu:
tankage when im good enough =P


You will be a tank when you are good enough, but in the meantime you are just going to be a doorstop that does about as much dps as the previous 85 dps app. Hope you lick monitors and kick really well so you at least break 255, my buckets do more than that.

Final Comments:
ill update magelo soon.


I hope so, seeing as you last updated it FOURTEEN MONTHS AGO! (See below)

im 31k hp 4800ac buffed atm
thank you for your time


i had tripple his aa and more hp/ac when i apped 2 years ago.

This one may take the prize for Most Half-Assed App ever.
Magelo last updated 14 months ago.
Next.


Not the most half-ass post ever... but may be a top 5.



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What I can offer Club Fu:
dps, its what I do, its what I know and im really good at it! I used to hate Fu, more so b/c it was the compeating guild =) but after talking to some Fu members and really getting some insite. sounds like theres a TON less Drama then (guild deleted) and MOST of all, people are expected to preform daily, not just when they feel like it


Fuck classes we need, is there any chance we'll ever see an app that DOESN'T have a spelling mistake?

Man, what a mess. Let's highlight the fun bits.

dps, its what I do, its what I know and im really good at it! I used to hate Fu, more so b/c it was the compeating guild =) but after talking to some Fu members and really getting some insite. sounds like theres a TON less Drama then (guild deleted) and MOST of all, people are expected to preform daily, not just when they feel like it

There is more than that, but you get the picture.

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Final Comments:
i'm a slower typer lmao


Perhaps you would type faster if you didn't insert extra letters... hmmm?

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(App name deleted) - 13
--- Ancestral Obligation Rk. II - 4
--- Cannibalization - 1
--- Champion - 2
--- Shadow of Renewal Rk. II - 1
--- Spirit Call - 1
--- Talisman of the Lynx Rk. III - 2
--- Turgur's Swarm - 1
--- Unity of the Spirits Rk. II - 1

in that long ass fight he only casted lynx 2 times....only 13 casts all together....wtf....did he crawl out from under a rock or something, he must be one of those nice AFK players who stay tabbed out 90% of the time and then go OH YAH i am raiding

There is no hiding that this is a shaman app and apparently a very lazy one. Come on, seriously? I saw the rest of this parse and most other casters, including shaman averaged 75 casts. Hell, I would cast that many Ancestral Obligations in the 2 min prior to the fight, with full mana. Let's not even mention the part where they don't cast any dots or nukes at all... oops, already did.

P.S... The past tense of "cast" is cast... not casted... which isn't a word at all.

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What I can offer Club Fu:

I have been attending any raid with any guild I can, not for loot, but this game bores me as I have very little that needs to be done. On that note, I can offer to be at every last raid fathomable.

OK, 1. You are bored with the game. It's time you left then, not apped with a raiding guild.
2. As indicated in your app you have very little that needs to be done, yet right away we see you are not flagged to the end of Void and you don't have a Crystallos flag. Don't make me look at your Magelo and point out all the other stuff you are missing.

Seeds of Destruction Progression:
Void E

Crystallos Raid --- not keyed

I am quick to aggro multiple adds if needed, with damage, no damage spells or tactics.


This sentence basically plays out like this... "I run about willy-nilly waving my arms and randomly hitting whatever comes near me." Key words here being "no damage spells or tactics."

I hold my aggro and can take or loose aggro as needed in situations.

This sentence made me laugh for two reasons. 1. Isn't everything a situation no matter how benign? situation: noun; the state of affairs; combination of circumstances. 2. How does one go about making aggro "loose" as opposed to "lose", which is entirely different.
Everybody cut foot loose? Kick off your Sunday shoes?

The someone in Fu replies to this app as follows. Made funnier by them clearly not catching the spelling error of "loose".

Tanks very well. Holds aggro very tightly. Knows his class.

Everybody cut foot tight, Kick off your Staturday (sic) shoes.

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They're fucking douchebag assclowns.

Sometimes the insults catch me off guard and give me a nice chuckle. Like this one.
Sounds like they will fit in just fine.


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About the only requirement for a cleric to make it into fu is a pulse. Unfortunately I don't think this cleric has one.

That's probably true for most guilds, not just Club Fu.
And speaking of clerics, where can I get a proc to put in my shield so I can bash with it? /nod

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She's got the attention span of a retarded chihuahua.

Are you trying to say that the inbred hyperactive Downs Syndrome of the animal kingdom comes in a NON-retarded version?

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He sent me tells the other day, out of the blue, and addressed me as bro. I am, in fact, not his bro so I ignored the tells.

That's pretty much how it goes with me too. I am neither your bro, nor am I your hun. As my hot key used to say, "I am not a member of a nomadic and warlike Asian people who devastated or controlled large parts of eastern and central Europe and who exercised their greatest power under Attila in the 5th century a.d. and my mother was not your mother. Thanks for playing though."

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if I had one "no vote" per lifetime, I would use it on him.

Tell us what you really think about them.

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If youre a fucking retarded

I have always loved the word "retarded", especially because 90% of the people who use it don't manage spelling it correctly or using it in it's proper tense. Thus causing my Irony Klaxon (TM) to go off.

Helpful hint #284: If you are going to call someone else dumb, stupid, retarded or anything similar, make sure you spell check and grammar check it before hitting the submit button.

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i know my class and how to play my class. i can heal till i am oom or dead (dead usally comes first)

You know your class AND how to play your class. Good for you. As for being able to heal till your are out of mana or dead... pretty much anyone with a heal spell can do that. Are you related to the breed of canine known as a Chihuahua?


Computer Specs:
ran by a hamster


Ran being the past tense of run... I must ask, what powers your computer now? Or were you trying to convey that your computer jogged by a hamster?

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AsA

In response to an application someone writes...

ROFL w r u aa ? i know alts with more aa than this omg

Then in response to that...

Where are your words? Sad.... where is Valcrist when I need him to help me out here!

I will let Valcrist know of this affront posthaste!

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From one of my favorite people in Club Fu. In this quote they are talking about another guildie's defense for an applicant.

Occasionaly it's neccesary for the Magic 8-ball to be brought out in those tough app situations where a consencus just can't be reached as we see here where one person defends them and others deride them.

Well, since we have such contention on this app, I had better consult the expert. Magic 8 ball says:
"My sources say no" Bummer, that. Sorry (fu guildie name deleted) . In light of your heartfelt, caps-less, punctuation-less, internet-spoken paean to the glory that is (app named deleted) , it just isn't going to work out. After all, the magic 8 ball has as much authority on these matters as anything else said in this, or any, app thread.


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Final Comments:
If Im accepted u will see me at the raids at every opportunity.I miss it alot and I want the challenge again.Im friendly to guildees and like to help out alot.


All I have to say is... at raids, at every opportunity, miss it alot, help out alot and friendly to guildees, but then I guess a douche to everyone else. And for the record, "alot" is two words.

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There you have it folks. The end to Chapter 5 in the Soul Train of Apps.
Hope you had as many laughs reading these as I did.

Till part 6 comes... Love to 86% of you 45% of the time. This has a +- error factor of 12.5%

Flippety ~ Beating Voodoman with a puppy named Canuck and a country where 97.3% of its population lives in igloos no less than 1 kilometer from the American border for the day when they invade... so you don't have to.
Lay on, Macduff, : And damn'd be him that first cries, 'Hold
 posted by Flippety on Mon Apr 27, 2009 9:29 pm



Lay on, Macduff, and damn'd be him that first cries, 'Hold, enough!...

Recruitment come about and lay anchor!



Time for a little recruitment! It's been awhile and Club Fu is once again on the lookout for a few excellent players from a few select classes.

Read on MacDuff...



Four classes... see... count them... 1, 2, 3, 4. Are you one of these? Do you have the drive to go go go, kill kill kill, and not burn burn burn out?
Be a part of the Bristlebane guild with all the server first kills for years and years.



ROGUE


Are you a rogue? I will pet you and love you and call you George.
(I promise not to pet you until you die... much.)



Berzerkers make me long for Paat.

MMmmmmmm Mgb Warcry.



Spiders! Ahhhhh!



Nuke Nuke Nuke *flex finger* nuke nuke nuke.
Hi Mike!

Weeeeeeeeeezards *clink clink* Come out to plaaaaaaa-eeeee-aaayy *clink clink*

Pretty simple really. A Rogue, a Berzerker a Mage and a bevy of Wizards.

Come on... you know you want to.

Click this bucket filled link to register on the Club Fu forum This is required before apping.

Once you have registered use or if you are alreadyUSE THIS LINK TO FIND YOUR CLASS There you will find a link to fill out your application.

Don't be retarded in your application. Use the best grammar and spelling available to you. Be thorough but concise. dont b 1 of teh peepul that tipes like tihs,

Until the next bucket ~ I am forever yours...

Flippety ~ Beating Valcrist with a ball of tightly wound silk and a freshly stained pair of boxers bearing the letters V.S. across the ass... so you don't have to.
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